Reflecting, learning and being fearless

A week ago today I was watching the sunset as I waited in line to cross the border back into Canada. I just kept reflecting on what a great weekend I had at the PNWA conference. Not only did it allow me to validate myself as a writer but I got to meet with like-minded people and spend 72 hours just talking about writing. I was able to give feedback, which made me think how I could make my own pitch and story better, and get feedback, which is something I constantly long for.

I learned the importance of a strong synopsis and how it differs from a query. A query letter has the hook, the book, and the cook. A synopsis should concisely tell the story without any long-windedness. The agents on the panel also discussed some of the things they like seen avoided, and I was surprised to find many of them don't want to know the ending! They'd rather the synopsis establish the story and leave it off on a cliffhanger with all major plot points intact. A synopsis uses active voice, must never have a wasted word, does not need emotion and should never have a rhetorical question! Well, I immediately went home and rewrote everything my synopsis was.

The character development panel was sort of interesting because the panelist gave good examples but most of what he said was not new to me. I did, however, like how he separated character development into three categories. The police report gives the reader basic description, how they dress and defining features. The military report dives deeper into skill level, education, what they can/can't do, quirks and beliefs seen from the outside. And the psychological report describes the character's fears, dreams and the way their background shapes their present.

One panel I hadn't expected to attend was the one about memoir writing. I felt a little nervous entering the room for most of the attendees had a few decades on me and the look of those who had a story to tell. I'm just shy of three decades and have a mere experience I want to write about not a whole life. Still, the panelist was extremely inspiring and backed up everything he was saying with a beautiful piece he had written about him and learning about his son's autism. It was so real and believable everyone applauded. It was worth going just to hear him read! According to him, a memoir is writing about a correction to perception. It should have the reader asking what will happen next. Every scene should begin with a disturbing event, and by that he meant, an event that disturbs the peace. A passive scene does not an interesting story make. And the most important thing I walked away with was, always know why you are telling your story.

Probably the most useful panel was my last one: Cleaning up your Manuscript. Proofreading is so difficult... I now know, after attending the panel, that I should get my hands on a copy of 'The Gregg Reference Manual' by William A. Sabin. It is the highest standard of grammar used and the one all other style books branch off of. I also now know that when I create a list--Sarah likes to write, read, and ride horses, a comma is used after every listed thing or else I'd be implying that I can both read and ride horses, of which I kinda can but not in the sense I am going for! My teachers always taught me you did not need a comma before and. Who knew? Anyway, I also finally put to rest whether I had to capitalize 'the empress' or not and if I needed the additional S after 'the priestess's.' And the final thought I walked away with: You don't want them to read your writing, you want them to read your story.

All and all it was a real success and I ended up meeting with some fantastic editors and agents who I hope I will one day get to work with. Then came the hard part. After all the excitement of having my material requested, I had to actually follow through and provide it. A part of me wanted to just keep it for myself. If I never sent it I would never be rejected. But that wouldn't be very fearless or writery of me so I threw my story to the wind and am hoping it lands right where it belongs.

Writing instead of just dreaming

My writer's block was cured! One day, quite suddenly the words began to freely pour out on to paper again. I actually forgot I was even suffering from a block at all until I visited my blog and was reminded of it in my last post. So maybe writer's block is a thing. Or maybe I was just experiencing a prolonged period of laziness. Or maybe just maybe it was the 2014 Pacific Northwest Writer's Association Conference that kicked me into gear.

Four years ago I finished my first book. It was amazing and brilliant. It was going to take the YA world by storm and change the way people thought about life, the universe and everything. Or, it was going to be met with a little bit of interest, a few polite words of praise and then go on to collect dust and become a perfect reminder that one must walk before they run. I will never regret a) writing that first book and b) attending the 2010 conference because it taught me way more than just sitting around dreaming about being a writer ever could. I learned I'd need an agent, a platform, a query and a synopsis. That I'd need to actually write a few drafts of my novel before flinging it out there and that I'd need to have a good reason to write that book.

Fast forward to present day, a few manuscripts and hours and hours of research later I feel The Sky Empress is in much better shape and ready to see the light of day. Hopefully so will some of the people I met today. Today at the conference it was all about putting the last four years together: all the studying, all the edits, all the books I've written since. Today felt kind of like the test after a four year long class. Hopefully I passed.

Trying to sum it all up into some sort of moral for this blog post and all I can really think about is this warm glowing feeling of success. Going to conferences is about learning the craft and business, meeting new people, making connections, learning how to tell your story in a few lines and presenting yourself about a writer but it is also about gaining confidence. More than anything I think today made me feel like I was a real writer and I needed that. Being surrounded by hundreds of people dedicated to writing felt so wonderful and to simply be able to turn to someone and just begin talking about something I have such a passion for was inspiring. I guess what I'm trying to say is conferences are an amazing learning tool but they're also a way to reaffirm yourself as a writer. Because you are. The minute you stop just dreaming and starting writing is the day you are a writer.

Is this writer's block?

I'm not sure if I believe in writer's block or not. I have had times of feeling uninspired and times where I'm just being down right lazy but I never excused it as writer's block. Now I'm not so sure.

Lately writing hasn't just been hard for me, it's been unpleasant. When I sit down to write usually it's like letting a race horse free. Like all the times I'm not writing, I'm holding back the prancing thoroughbred in my mind. Then, I sit down at my laptop or with my notebook and lean forward letting the horse go. Suddenly I'm not collected anymore, I'm racing, unable to keep up with my thoughts, my words spill out on the page, galloping out of control. But not lately. Lately it's like there is an old draft horse in my mind that would rather be left out in pasture than plod about meaninglessly in the riding ring.

Even now I find myself stopping to stare out the window, pet my cat and pick my fingernails. Anything that keeps me from putting words to paper. I don't know why I can't break this block. I've done all the usual things: gone for walks, taken a good book to the beach, went horse-back riding, sat in my favourite coffee shop to people watch and flip through my old material but still when it comes to write I just don't want to.

And then comes the doubt. "You can't be a writer," the little voice says. "This will all be for nothing." "You'll never be published." With the absence of the muse comes the presence of insecurity. It would be easy enough to say I just write for me because it's fun and enjoyable but the truth will always be: I want to be an author. I want to make a career of this and be published in book stores so I can go and pick up a physical copy of my book and not just flip through the pages that thus far only exist in the digital. I want to go on book tours and tell aspiring writers that the road is rough but with enough time, energy and gumption everyone can achieve their dreams. I suppose I most want to be published because I want to have validation that dreams come true.

But before all that I must write.

Because as Lawrence Block said in 1981, "One thing that helps is to give myself permission to write badly. I tell myself that I'm going to do my five or 10 pages no matter what, and that I can always tear them up the following morning if I want. I'll have lost nothing--writing and tearing up pages would leave me no further behind than if I took the day off."

One Time, One meeting

Every Thursday I volunteer at the Lyceum in Vancouver. It's this really great place where writers of all ages come together to workshop, discuss and read. Usually I help out the little guys with their writing which means I scribe these elaborate stories they invent and try really hard not to burst out in giggles at their wonderful and fantastical imaginations. It's sort of my dream job (aside from being a writer) with only one catch, I don't get paid. Still, and I mean this without a cent of corniness, it's the satisfaction of helping children explore their imagination through prose that is the true reward.

Another exciting aspect of the job is setting up for events like book launches and Meet the Author evenings. Last month I got to meet Roberta Rich, author of The Midwife of Venice, and bond over writing about cultures abroad. She was very interesting and had me wishing I could jump the next plane to Turkey to explore the rich setting she had written about. This evening I met George Bowering. Admittedly I had not heard of him until I went to volunteer today and then I was glad I didn't blurt out, "So is Pinboy you're first book?" when I met him for he is the author of over 100 books! From plays and poetry to memoirs and history books, Bowering is as prolific author.

There is a saying in Japanese ichigo ichie that means, one time, one meeting. It refers to a chance encounter with someone and advises to treasure encounters for they might nor recur. Today I treasured an encounte

I spent most of the evening setting up, preparing food, arranging tables and cleaning. When people started arriving I took a break from house duties to have a glass of wine and chat. Quite by accident I found myself suddenly in this bubble with Bowering himself. Everyone was off in their own little conversations and it was just me and this famous writer. I stumbled over a few not-so witty comments at first before I found myself enjoying this wonderful conversation almost effortlessly. Telling people "I'm a writer" can sometimes be a difficult thing for me to do as I feel I have not yet earned such a title but around him it just slipped out. I don't know what I expected but at 27 (looking as though I'm no older than 16) I expected him to brush it off. Instead he spoke to me as an equal. It was an amazing experience. We share the theory that to be a writer you must be willing to read and cannot use the excuse that you are worried you're writing will be influenced. In fact we discussed that the best way to become a writer is to emulate favourite authors. Write like five or six of your favourite writers and soon you have blended all their voices into one of your own. There are no original ideas out there. There are however, original ways to express and improve on them. We talked about how as writers we take from books we have read and turn it into our own. I've read a lot books that had potential but never quite amounted to what I had hoped, so I've sometimes taken those ideas and developed them into my own plots.  Is that not the essence of writing? Constantly finding new ways to tell old stories?

I asked him if it was harder to write memoir or fiction and he replied that memoir was easier because the story had already happened. In fiction there is always that element of everything needing to happen for a reason but not in memoirs because it's the truth. Sometimes life happens without explanation. I enjoyed his thick laugh as he shrugged and simply said, "Sorry that actually happened." I had never thought of it that way. In a way writing nonfiction gives more freedom because you aren't having to constantly justify why the plot is written the way it is.  No one can justify why things happen the way they do in life.

Ten minutes of this easy conversation passed and slowly the bubble dissolved around us. I thanked him for his time and apologized for stealing him away from everyone else. He laughed and told me that we had just talked about all he was going to say that night and he might as well just go home. I returned his laughter and promised I'd pass along what we'd discussed. It was one of those fascinating moments where you meet someone so brief but the meeting was rich. It was one of those moments I actually felt like a writer.

Making a Career of Professional Writing

Four years ago I was in my final year of my Journalism degree when Chris Labonte, acquiring editor of Douglas & McIntyre Publishing, came to my university to give a lecture. Back then I was the arts & entertainment editor for the school paper and I was all over the story. For two hours he described the slush piles that a writer must wade though if they were going to succeed the painful process of getting published. I should have walked away frustrated and convinced I would never make it but instead I left inspired. Less than six months later I had written my first book, attended a writer's conference and even had requests to see my manuscript. Nothing ended up coming from the first novel but I learned so much and have learned so much since and I think a lot of the credit goes to Mr. Labonte.

His top ten pieces of advice to new writer were:

1. Commit. Do it and do it now.
2. Write a lot. You don't find your voice until you have written a million words. Read a lot. If you don't like reading you're going to have a hard time.
3. Start to think like a writer. Carry a journal to jot down ideas.
4. Observe like a writer. Even walking down the street can turn into a creative narrative.
5. Write everyday. Let it be a day of good writing or bad writing as long as it's a day of writing.
6. It's important to get feedback. Build writing relationships.
7. Stick with it.
8. Learn about the business.
9. learn to market yourself.
10. Take the long view. You are building a career, but act now and make sure you are leaving time to renew, refresh and review.

Without even realizing it, until I found this article I wrote, I emulated all the advice he gave into my writing routine. I write and read a lot even when it sucks. I learn a lot from bad writing and even more from bad reading. Sometimes identifying what I don't like in a book helps me to avoid it in my own. I've written well over a million words by now so hopefully I have a voice that's all my own. I've spent many years researching the business of writing and am using this blog specifically to market myself. So maybe four years later I'm on the write (get it? write instead of right!) track. I know at the very least I've followed step one: I'm committed.

That Byline Moment

The first time I was ever published I was ten and I never saw the final copy. Not sure what happened but somewhere along the line I went under the radar and submitted a poem to the National Poetry contest for children and was selected to be published. As often happens when you are ten, you forget to communicate and so no one ever saw 'The Autumn Breeze' in print. At least no one who I knew.

The second time I was published was more than a decade later while in my first year of journalism. It was the moment I had been waiting for all my life and with the perfect article in mind I submitted to the local newspaper. Two days later I saw my name in print for the first time. I will never forget that feeling. It was the first time I received the validation I needed to be a writer. The first night I danced around my apartment, waving about the poor newspaper that ended up ripped and crumpled. The second day I tried to act all cool about it: "Yeah, that was my name you saw in the newspaper, no biggie." Until my mother (possibly one of the greatest on earth) fished out yesterday's paper from the news bin as Starbucks and announced to the whole cafe that her daughter was a published writer. I was mortified... ... ...and also kinda tearing up for it was true. I just remembered all this as I came across the article (which said best mother ever frame for me for Christmas) and hung it on the wall.

May I never forget that moment my heart leaped into my throat and happy tears streamed down my cheeks, the first moment I saw my byline. May I have many more bylines and never take that moment for granted.

All About Mapping

I have always envied the mind maps of some of the greats. Some wrote on walls, other kept thoughts pinned up with thumbtacks and string that end up representing a work of art more than a plan and most recently one of my favourite writers, Kristin Cashore, wrote about her handmade cloth bulletin board she uses to keep track of her ideas. I wish I was more like them. But every time I try to keep a bulletin board or a scrapbook of inspiration like this it always ends up looking so contrived, like I spend more time thinking of how to organize my ideas than writing them down. I often vow to have better writing habits and often fail.

Instead I keep all my ideas in a notebook. After years of trying to be good about keeping a journal I finally found what was holding me back and it was such a simple fix! Lines! I absolutely hate lines on my pages! By accident I one day purchase a sketchbook instead of a notebook. I was already off at my favortie coffee shop with a latte in hand and didn't want to run back to purchase a lined one so I put pen to paper and just started to write. I was amazed by the fact that there were no boundaries. I could write as big or small as I wanted with the added bonus of there being no lines running through the middle of my pictures and that is how the following came about.

A general map outlining Luxumbra

A more detailed map of just Amekuni and Momoka's journey.

An even more detailed map of the Merporte capital.

Turns out I hate lines but love maps! Along with my wild notes, that run about the page wherever they please, I keep maps of the stories I'm writing. Not mind maps but actual maps and since I started drawing them my plots have started making more sense. So there I have it. I still have terrible writing habits but at least I have my maps.

How do you map your story?